I guess a lot more people read this than I thought. It's in my nature to not censor anything, because I don't care who knows what about my life. I have nothing to hide. I'm going to start being a little more careful though, because not everything is only mine to tell.
I feel like I set myself up for every bad thing that happens to me. I need to learn how to avoid this. I need to do something, one specific thing, and I really don't want to do it, which is exactly why I need to.
People are always constantly searching for mates. It's like, in our genetic makeup I suppose. But I feel like now that I'm single, I have to be careful about what I let people think. I don't want anyone to think I'm interested but I think I give off that vibe sometimes. I don't want to date anyone. I don't want to be with anyone. I want to be with myself. I want to take the fuck off and get out of here. I want to have fun with my friends and sleep with my best friend and no one else, ever. Which is not to say I want to be with him, it just means I want to sleep with him. And no one seems to understand that. Everyone is talking. Evvvveryone is talking. Everyone is always talking.
My thoughts and feelings are everywhere. I'm a little messy inside right now. I'm drinking alone.
Tomorrow night I'm going to drink at Stephie's house with Tanya. Wine and girls is always the best combination. Wednesday night Lindsay, Tony, Chris Fisher, Bryce, and possibly Amber are coming over to drink here. Then I work every day for like, ever.
Right now the alcohol is getting to me and I need to go to bed. I hope Milo sleeps with me tonight, he has been lately, since Blake's been gone. It's like he knows I can't sleep alone.
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